Barttimesnow Topic-Contest Winner!

The official results are in! We, here at Barttimesnow, would like to thank the millions of participants from all over the world! We have spent countless hours opening fan mail and reading through your entries. Because of your tireless enthusiasm and innumerable entries, we have spent far too many hours deciding on a winner. (AKA I lost my job and have been banned from any and all Foot Locker retail stores. I guess that’s a different story… a story that may or may not be told.)

We put all the entries in a hat –but because there were millions and millions of entries. and only so many can fit in my Florida Marlins baseball cap, we put as many as could fit in the cap and picked one. We then repeated this process over and over and over again, until we picked enough ‘winners’ to fill the cap one last time. We then pulled the final winning entry from the cap…. And we then drew one more time because we didn’t like the idea of writing about how ‘Obama deserves the Nobel Peace Prize’. (Really people? I said ‘interesting’ and ‘fun’ ideas… not to mention ideas that can be legitimately argued...) But we are proud to announce that after many reshuffles and a few scratched entries, we have chosen a winner.

And the winner is…ahem, drumroll please. … The winner is… now, where did that piece of paper go… I know it’s around here somewhere. … hang on, I’ll be right back… Hey, Dan! Have you seen that paper… that paper I was writing on… yes, I know how to write… yes, that also means I know how to read… I don’t know, probably like two days ago… it looked like a piece of paper, with writing on it… what do you mean ‘was it well written’?!... I’d say my penmanship nearly matches my grammatical schematics… yeah, I don’t know where that drumming is coming from… do you know where that paper is or not?... no, I do NOT need a Kleenex, thank you very much!… …

Sorry about that. Found it. The winner is:... Oh that's terrible. I demand a recount.

Heeeeeeelp!

Okay people. I'm trying to win a contest. It's a writing contest, if you must know. I've never won anything in my life, but with your help, I just might. For all of you who are Facebook users...

1) add this app http://apps.facebook.com/flavorcreator/
2) click 'vote for bottle'
3) type 'bart' in the search finder
4) then vote for my bottle!!

Just vote once a day until the 20th of October. (You KNOW you get on facebook once a day!) Thanks you're all great!

ps-We're still accepting entries for the Barttimesnow contest that could win you something 'awesome'. For details, see the previous post.

The Contest You DON'T Want to Win

I'm starting a friendly competition, and currently, I'm winning. Whoever can give me the best topic to write about wins an awesome prize. (Remember: my definition of 'awesome' and your definition of 'awesome' might be completely different.) No but really... let me know if you have anything that you'd like to see me tackle. (Figuratively, of course. I really don't want to pop another rib out of place.) Just comment with your idea on this post and you've entered the contest! There I go... just winning myself to the top.

Remember winning is everything, unless losing gets you ice cream.